Taking Care of Others and Finding Self-Care

My oldest has painful tendinitis right now. A busy teen. Perhaps too busy at times with high school and 6 days a week practicing with his crew team. What I realized last night as I stayed up with him to finish homework, talk about his painful knees and promise him it would get better in time - is that I rarely take care of myself the same way. It’s a mom thing, a caretaker thing, a spouse or partner thing. Something many can relate to. Looking beyond the hype of external self-care and finding self-care in self-trust. Trust I will pause when needed. Trust I will find myself on my yoga mat or listen deeper when I’m needing more. 

What I realize more and more is my self-care is not so different than how I care for others. Last night I choose to put something down I wanted to do for me. To listen and help my son. He didn’t ask me for help but somehow I knew helping him would calm my nerves and soothe my heart. Similar to when I slow down for me - in my backyard or on my yoga mat. Self-care may be just a few moments in the sun on my face (with spf 50), or feeling the earth under my feet. 

My caretaking extends beyond my family and friends. I have always had a great love for animals. You name it. Elephants, horses, dogs, goats, I had pet mice as a kid along with dogs and stray cats. Currently we have four dogs, four chickens and I find they are higher on the care list than I am most days. I don’t write this with resentment. But rather with wonder. For I love my caretaking and peacemaking quality. Momma Bear came quick to me with all beings. As a child my Father told me I always wanted to make sure an animal could take care of “themselves”. My self-care is through the care of  other beings I love so much. What I learn in caring for them I turn inward next time I need to same. A simple reflection in this mirror of care. 

Here is to more moments we listen deeper to what calls me. Extra time with any being that helps me soften. Thank you to all the beings in my life - feathered, four legs, two legs and the spider I put outside this morning. For with every moment of care I am more present to what matters. To me. 

Thank you Serena, one of our backyard chickens for wrapping your sweet chicken feet around my fingers and giving me this pause. You are not our most cuddly hen in our yard which made this moment extra special. While I have told myself these moments are for others they return to me in abundance. 

📸 my favorite fellow introvert @shoopsphotography