The Pressure of Fresh Starts

I used to love a fresh start. My late grandmothers perfectly made bed; she hung the sheets to dry and then ironed them. Carefully placing a duvet in between. The bed smelled a little like sunshine and lavender. Finishing a shampoo bottle, having a new to-do list. I am learning to keep my fresh starts simple these days.

Sometimes, we love fresh starts when we think we can erase the past or dismiss it, maybe pretend we would be a newish person or not have the character traits we did. A fresh start meant ignoring our experiences, our past, or just what makes us the humans that we are.

Sometimes, a fresh start can mean dismissing ourselves rather than knowing ourselves deeper and then choosing how we wanted to begin again.

I have found that a fresh start must come with compassion, a whole bunch for ourselves. Owning who we are may differ from the fresh start we want, but it is much more realistic and attainable. Beginning again comes with steps forward and steps back. A mentor of mine years ago told me, when I was feeling rather stuck, "As long as there is movement, it is good; you can move forward and backward. You can take a step forward and even two steps back, but there is movement".

Movement for us as humans is so significant. Movement allows us to breathe, regulate our nervous systems, and find a deeper exhale as we see more compassion for how we show up.

Years ago, I did away with New Year's Resolutions. I did not often set myself up for adding to my being but instead taking away from who I was – but I didn't know this. We must know ourselves first before we step forward into new.

So wherever you find yourself in this New Year, know that just showing up is plenty. And before making big statements or resolutions, we get to know ourselves better. What works for us and not for others?

This year, you may not have to find a new intention, resolution, or new beginning.

Perhaps you choose to be, observe, and meet yourself where you are. I cannot think of anything more lovely than you spending time with you in the most nourishing of ways.

No matter where this finds, you know a New Year or fresh start does not need to have begun on January 1st. You may begin again at any time. My hope and wish for you is whatever your intention is in this season, you can find ease, a little "I got this," and a lot of love for you.